Parents Abandoning Their Children: Why?

There are parents who abandon their children, fathers and mothers who at some point fail their responsibilities and decide to leave. The cases of child abandonment are as many, different and unique as are the people involved. Such an experience represents trauma for the child, but it is also true that some situations may have underlying reasons.

Poverty and scarce resources are often the main reasons for making this difficult choice. In other cases, they are very young parents who decide to give their children up for adoption or entrust them to family members. In these cases we cannot speak of real abandonment, but certainly society tends to judge them as such.

We are faced with a hard and multi-faceted reality in terms of motivations, situations and particular realities. However, we cannot underestimate the extent of these experiences in children. Growing up without a father, reaching adolescence without the figure of a mother marks and leaves gaps.

Because there are parents who abandon their children

In our daily life we ​​often come across dramatic stories that should never happen. Despite the progress of society, the abandonment of children is still a reality.

Even today there are newborns who are found in the most absurd places, often following the sad reality of mothers who have hit rock bottom, where social services have not been able to reach.

The abandonment of a child is never a temporary decision, it is not a choice that is made at any moment. Generally, therefore, it is the result of a long meditation and reflection after which, for whatever reason, we opt for the most tragic solution. Let’s analyze the most common reasons.

The financial difficulties of parents who abandon their children

Poverty and social exclusion are the main reasons that lead a parent (or both) to abandon their children. It is essential that society identifies and intervenes in these extreme situations.

Drug abuse, alcoholism

Drug abuse and social exclusion usually go hand in hand. Yet, it can also be the case of a couple in which one of the parents has become an alcoholic. Children of alcoholic parents are said to experience two types of neglect.

The first takes place at home, when lack of care, lack of affection or even violence can act as a prologue to what will happen soon. The definitive abandonment by the family will follow.

Unwanted pregnancies

When wondering why there are parents who abandon their children, it is important to take into account unwanted pregnancies. In this context, the most disparate situations could arise. Cases of violence are an example, as are pregnancies carried out by minors. These are extreme situations, in which many young people feel alone and do not know how to act.

On the other hand, other situations may arise, such as couples discovering they are expecting a child. While one parent eagerly accepts this news, the other does not experience it in the same way. Sooner or later he could opt for the permanent abandonment of the house.

Escaping Ties: Immature Parents

There are immature fathers and mothers without maternal instinct, parents who, at some point, decide to abandon their children. Not everyone is ready to take on such a responsibility and however much they voluntarily seek a child, reality shows that they are overwhelmed.

Generally speaking, abandonment is most common within the first year of life, but the immature father or mother can make this decision at any time. It matters little whether the children are three, five or ten years old, the decision has already been considered and they choose to escape from any bond.

Problems with the partner: abandonment as a solution to start over

Among the various reasons why some parents abandon their children, we need to delve deeper into the problems of the couple. Disagreements, separations, complicated divorces, difficulties encountered in attempts to agree on child support or custody lead many parents to the most extreme solution: permanent abandonment.

These realities are particularly difficult for children, who not only witness distancing, quarrels and tensions between parents. In some cases, they may even feel guilty about a parent’s escape.

On the other hand, it is common for the departed parent to start a new life with another person, with whom he forms a new family. In these cases it is not certain that a new abandonment will occur. It is dramatic, as well as almost incomprehensible, that people choose not to be part of their children’s lives anymore due to disagreements with their partner.

In conclusion, the reasons why a person abandons their child are, in many cases, as complex as they are reprehensible. Clearly there are situations that are understandable, while others are to be condemned. Either way, you need to do everything possible to prevent them from occurring.

The absence of a parent leaves an unbridgeable void in a child’s life. It is also a wound that does not close in adulthood. Let’s keep that in mind.