I’m Tired Of Pleasing Others

I got tired of pleasing others. I have to admit that I have long believed that making others happy was one of the most important things in life. Today I no longer believe that it is so fundamental. And even if it were, I decide when and if I want to do it … Or not.

I have learned that I am a complete person. Before, I was afraid of rejection and didn’t accept the idea of ​​not liking someone. This caused my mind to become saturated. I got to a point where there was no room for anything else, not even for myself.

Saying NO makes me free

I believed that living doing what I liked most was synonymous with freedom. Today I realized that there is something even more important: DON’T do what I don’t want to do.

When we are unable to say no to the request to do something, we unwittingly chain ourselves to the wishes of others. It doesn’t matter if it’s your boss, friend or family member. There will come a time when you will feel that you are not doing what is best for you.

Even when they tell you that they are truly grateful to you for the favor you are doing to them, pleasing others is a heavy burden to carry. This is why I learned that saying “no” is equivalent to being free.

Today I want to live life as I like it. And sometimes that also means staying indoors, or hanging out with fewer people than you thought necessary.

I like making decisions

Pleasing others often leads us to act like robots. We end up doing what others want, because we believe they are wiser. And they may be, but you will never learn if you don’t make any decisions yourself.

How to live, what to do, what to feel, where to go… These are such simple questions, and so important at the same time. When you understand that it is only you who can answer these questions and find your way, many doors will open for you.

They told me that I have become more selfish: it is true, and it does not bother me. Many might say it’s a bad thing, but the truth is that selfishness is only bad when it hurts someone. If we live our life following our values ​​and without harming any of our loved ones, none of our decisions can be considered negative. I’m sorry for those who had already decided which path my life should take …

I don’t care that I let them down, because I know that if they really love me, they want the best for me. And as for the others, they can also disappear from my life. If they don’t want the best for me, this isn’t their place.

I have learned to ask for help

When I got tired of pleasing others, I learned that there were many people willing to help me. Some have been there at my every step, others have arrived when I asked them. And that doesn’t mean that some people care more about me than others.

It just means that everyone has their own life, and can’t always focus on mine. But I’ve learned that true friends stay there despite everything. When they need you, they say it. When you need them, they come.

Before, I thought no one wanted to support me, but I realized it was an idea due to my insecurity. I realized that, even if I’m not perfect, I have to love myself and have faith in my worth.

I said goodbye to toxic relationships

When I stopped wanting to please others at all costs, I also moved away from destructive relationships. From those people who can hurt you with just a word, those who are never by your side when you need them. They were the ones who made me feel insecure, and I don’t want them next to me anymore.

Today I decided to surround myself with true friends. I have found that there are fewer than I wanted, but they are just the ones I need. I am not willing to tolerate anything to be accepted. I have even decided to say goodbye to some members of my family. Sure, it can be tricky, but it’s about drawing boundaries. Maybe they won’t like it, but it did me really well!

Pleasing others gets you nowhere

And you? Are you one of those people who are continually afraid of not pleasing others? Do you live your life intensely, or do you live the life you were told to live?

If you have not yet stopped pleasing others at any cost, I challenge you to try for a while. Take a month off, just for you. Get away from anything you don’t like. Forget the convenience of following external instructions, and live as you want. You will discover a new sensation, which will fill you, and which you will never want to leave.