Those Who Have Not Faced Adversity Do Not Know Their Strength
In Western society, adversity is underestimated. We have too limited a concept of it and we highlight only situations or people that are unfavorable or hostile to us. We tend not to consider what lies behind an adverse circumstance, namely the struggle reaction. It is with that struggle that a rich and profound self-learning is created.
It is nice to swim in calm waters, but you learn little from being in the calm sea. Our life works the same way: as long as it is peaceful, we will not have to use our strength. A person who does not know adversity does not know himself and does not recognize his limitations. Adversity is like a prism: once we have looked into it, we will never see things the same way again.
People can live for years without knowing their true abilities and characteristics for several reasons: because they have avoided adversity or because they have not yet clashed with it. Every adversity gives a little self-knowledge and, in most cases, has a pleasant surprise in store: you are not aware of your strength until being strong is the only option.
“The blows of adversity are very painful, but they are never sterile”.
Resilience: courage in misfortune
Resilience is the ability of an individual or a group of people to recover from adversity to continue projecting into the future. Sometimes harsh circumstances allow you to develop skills that were previously only latent and that the subject did not know.
Positive psychology recognizes that this is a common response and that it is a way to adapt to adversity. There are several circumstances that may or may not favor the development of resilience in people, such as education, family relationships and the social context. In practice, resilience is linked to self-esteem, so it is important to work with children from an early age so that they can develop this ability in a healthy way.
A child with good self-esteem will develop into an adult with good resilience, so they will be ready to overcome the obstacles they will encounter in their lifetime. It is important to guide children efficiently during their early stage of life so that they develop a constructive method for coping with difficulties.
Success is not the end and mistakes are not failure
We tend to think that our willpower comes out of nowhere, as if it were an inexhaustible source. However, a curious study reveals that when we have spent all day exercising self-control, we are more forgiving in the evening. This means that willpower is a quality that we must learn to measure.
Sometimes it is difficult to find this strength to move forward. The state of mind, circumstances foreign to us and our thoughts can play tricks on us. To find our inner strength, we must focus on what really interests us, avoiding the lost causes, the ones for which we cannot do anything. This is the attitude that will allow us to harness our energy and fight for our goals.
In a competitive culture like ours, many people are driven by extrinsic motivation. They want to flaunt their milestones as if they were medals hanging around their necks to gain the approval or admiration of others. Behaviors of this type are very dangerous because in this case we end up entrusting others with the task of nourishing our strength to continue, while we should be doing it ourselves.
When the strength to continue is internal, however, we move to make our dreams come true, driven by an intrinsic motivation that is the most powerful engine of behavior and the most grateful entity there is when it receives energy.
